Am I Broken Enough?

A broken man's greatest desire is to be clean again, just to be forgiven and restored.

The older I get, the more I need to be broken by God. My flesh is in operation 24 hours a day and consistently working on justifying its actions. Never will my flesh seek God for a solution, nor will it warn me when I stray. Thank God for the power of the Holy Spirit, reminding me to check myself to ensure I am in the faith. It is ludicrous to think that I am always in the faith. Faith is fleeting and constantly needs to be replenished. When the flesh is in operation, you can be sure that faith has been set aside. The flesh and faith cannot occupy the same space simultaneously. I will either trust God or lean on my own understanding. I must confess like David when he sinned against God. Confronted with the truth, he could only say, "I have sinned against the Lord."

So, I empathized with David, realizing that his secret had been revealed. You find it hard to breathe when blunt honesty vocalizes your guilt. I have experienced the blood draining from your face and my heart pounding as the shame washes over me. There is nowhere to hide. I am forced to admit my sins and accept my wrongdoing and the consequences of my actions.     My brokenness causes me to feel far away from God. I often feel hopeless and question God's love for me. But, of course, this is not true; God is always with me, and His love is unconditional, and being broken draws me closer to His presence. However, the question remains, "Am I broke enough?"